Renew my Brokenenss

Our “RENEW” study may have been one of the greatest blessings of this past year. In a year full of brutal, it was sure some good stuff!!!!

Recap:

Renew - January - intro; February - Renew our zeal (Gretchen); March - joy (Katie….the last one in person until now); April -fear (Myia); May- perspective (Michelle); June - witness (Kayce); July- Humility (Susan); August - relationships (Myia); September - minds (Gretchen); October - strength (Michelle);

Share where I found this teaching….Nancy way back in 1995….It was life changing and so so helpful… It sounds like a negative word but in light of Scripture, it is anything but!! It made me want to renew my brokenness rather than be defeated by it. After hearing this teaching and reading Nancy’s book on brokenness, I was able to see that brokenness is not a feeling or an emotion….IT IS A CHOICE I MAKE….it is a lifestyle. Nancy said, “A lifestyle of agreeing with God about the true condition of my heart and my life as He alone can see it. It's a lifestyle of unconditional, absolute surrender of my will to God.” WOW...just wow.

And you may say, why in the world would I want to be broken….what brokenness is not….its not being a victim...we fight against this everyday!!!….it's not being sad and gloomy all the time walking around like your on your last leg…..it's not being an Eeyore..it doesn't mean you never laugh or smile...and it’s not a woe is me I am horrible sinner mentality either….its not somebody who goes around looking for all the things wrong in their life - this can lead to false humility….being broken doesn't mean crying all the time….sometimes people are broken by a tragic circumstance….now I'm not saying that God can't use situations but you can be heartbroken and not broken hearted...hurt and tragedy doesn't necessarily mean brokenness.

Worldly definition of broken is - having given up all hope; despairing. subdued completely : Synonyms: CRUSHED, SORROWFUL defeated

But what does brokenness before the Lord look?? Biblical definition of broken (hearted) - People who feel their spiritual bankruptcy and helplessness, and who long for the help and salvation of God. Such people are in the right condition to be met and blessed by God.

Learned this from reading Nancy’s book on brokenness….roof off and walls down. Brokenness is a lifestyle that takes me in two directions. It's a lifestyle vertically of living, so to speak, with the roof off in my relationship toward God….honest and real... transparent honesty and humility before Him. But it's a lifestyle that requires also that I live with the walls down in my relationships toward others...how often does our brokenness come from relationships...kids, spouses, friends, parents, siblings...

Look what the Bible says about being broken….

Blessed [to be envied, happy] are those who are poor in spirit, [those who are bankrupt, those who are poverty-stricken, those who are destitute, those who have no resources of their own] for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. And blessed [happy, to be envied] are those who mourn. For they [those who mourn over their sin, those who grieve over that which grieves the heart of God] will experience the comfort that only God can give (Matt. 5:3-4).

For thus says the One who is high and lifted up,

who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy:

“I dwell in the high and holy place,

and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit,

to revive the spirit of the lowly,

and to revive the heart of the contrite.(Isa. 57:15).

This one who is holy dwells with those who are contrite and lowly in spirit.

Contrite - affected by guilt….

synonyms - remorseful, repentant, sorry….

antonyms - defiant, unrepentant….so if He dwells with those are contrite….remorseful, repentant, and sorry, what does that look like for the unrepentant?????

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted

and saves the crushed in spirit.(Ps. 34:18).

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;

a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.(Ps. 51:17).

THERE IS A BIG DIFFERENCE between the world’s view and the Biblical view of brokenness!! Where Satan wants us defeated, the Lord is glorified in our brokenness because when we are broken, we are in the right condition to be met and blessed by God!!!!

“We will never meet God in revival until we have first met Him in brokenness.” Nancy

In our brokenness….in true brokenness…there is...

a shattering of our self will, not what I want but your will be done….absolute surrender...yes, Lord!

A Stripping of self-reliance - a truly broken person has no confidence in her own righteousness….total dependence on God!...who love their lives everyday knowing that when we are weak, He is strong.

A softening of the soil in my heart….the opposite of hard hearted….makes me think of a teachable spirit, someone who knows they don't know all the things and are willing to learn..to be receptive and responsive to the WORD OF GOD.

Nancy said, “ The Broken contrite heart is easily molded by the hand of God.”

When I think of brokenness from a Biblical perspective, I think of characteristics like humble, quiet, obedient…

one of our greatest examples of brokenness is David….

Probably wrote Psalm 52 in his brokenness…..this is a walls down Psalm….he wrote it for all the people to see..

Create in Me a Clean Heart, O God...the title in my Bible

Psalm 51

Have mercy on me, O God,

according to your steadfast love;

according to your abundant mercy

blot out my transgressions.

Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,

and cleanse me from my sin!

We see it in a man who cries out to the Lord for mercy, who knows that he has no hope outside of Who God is (51:1-2).

For I know my transgressions,

and my sin is ever before me.

Against you, you only, have I sinned

and done what is evil in your sight,

so that you may be justified in your words

and blameless in your judgment.

Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,

and in sin did my mother conceive me.

Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,

and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

We see it in a man whose sin is on the forefront of his mind, reminding him again and again of his humanity and failure (51:3-6).

Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;

wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

Let me hear joy and gladness;

let the bones that you have broken rejoice.

Hide your face from my sins,

and blot out all my iniquities.

Create in me a clean heart, O God,

and renew a right spirit within me.

Cast me not away from your presence,

and take not your Holy Spirit from me.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation,

and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,

and sinners will return to you.

Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God,

O God of my salvation,

and my tongue will sing aloud of your righteousness.

O Lord, open my lips,

and my mouth will declare your praise.

We see it in a man whose greatest desire in this moment is just to be clean again, just to have his ugliness erased, just to be pure, just to be forgiven and restored to his precious friendship with the Lord, and is asking the only One capable to accomplish it. (51:7-15).

For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;

you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;

a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. We see it in a man who says this: “The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God” (51:17).

Do good to Zion in your good pleasure;

build up the walls of Jerusalem;

then will you delight in right sacrifices,

in burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings;

then bulls will be offered on your altar.

We see it in a man who would do anything to get back to an unhindered relationship with the Lord again, except that he knows he cannot do anything. It is not within his power to right this wrong (51:16-19).

What the Lord Desires

David knew something we dearly need to understand: God does not want us sinners to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and try harder. He does not want us to feed our pride by “making things right”, nor does he simply want sadness and sorrow over the consequences and pain our sin brings to us.

He wants spiritual brokenness, the kind of brokenness He can use. He wants godly sorrow that leads to repentance (2 Cor. 7:10, For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.)

And out of that desperation, out of grief and the hurt of a fractured heart over sin, God longs to produce humility in us. It is humility that allows us to recognize, as David did, who God is and who we are in comparison with him. It is humility that sets us up to come to grips with our sin.

The reason brokenness is beautiful is because of how God can use it in our lives. It is something that can draw us near to Him. Brokenness can make room for a contrite heart and repentance to bring us back into fellowship with Him when we have miserably failed... the beauty in spiritual brokenness is found in where it brings us.

Contrast David to Saul…. two Old Testament kings who sat on the same throne. One committed horrible sins against the heart of God. He committed adultery. He lied. He committed murder to cover up his sin, and then lived for an extended period of time in covering up his treacherous, traitorous sin against God and against His nation. Yet in the Scripture we are told that King David was a man after God's own heart.

King Saul, whose sin by comparison as we would measure it, does not begin to be as great as that of King David. All that Saul was guilty of, from the seeing of the eye, was incomplete obedience. And yet in response to his sin, he lost his kingdom; his family was destroyed. He came under the wrath and the judgment of God.

Why the difference? Both men were confronted by prophets over their sin. And both men said verbally, "I have sinned." But you see, when King Saul confessed his sin, his confession was in the context of blaming the people, defending himself, making excuses, rationalizing, justifying himself. He revealed the true condition of his heart when in the same breath as saying, "I have sinned," he also said, "Please don't tell the people." He covered up…..walls up.

But King David, when confronted with his sin, fell on his face before God in confession for all the world to see.

You see, a broken person doesn't care who knows. God was not as concerned about the nature of the sin itself as He was about the heart, attitude, and response of these men when confronted with their sin.

True brokenness is a tool by which God brings His wandering sheep back into His loving arms.

So Lord, break me.

The reason brokenness is beautiful is because of how God can use it in our lives. It is something that can draw us near to Him.

And that is why I want the Lord to renew our brokenness this Friendsgiving.

So looking at these verses and Scriptures what do we see?? What is the kind of heart that God revives and renews? The heart that God revives is the broken, the contrite, the humble heart. We have been talking all year about renewing areas of our lives that will make us look more like Jesus.

As mentioned earlier…..“We will never meet God in revival until we have first met Him in brokenness.”

Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. [but there is a process, first,] Cleanse your hands, you sinners. Purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. [First,] humble yourself in the sight of the Lord, and then he will lift you up (James 4:8-10).

"Oh God, show me what it means to be a broken person, to live a lifestyle of brokenness." What are some of the characteristics, the evidence of a proud, unbroken spirit? Why we should desire brokenness and how different our lives look when we are prideful and think that brokenness is a weakness.

Proud people focus on the failures of others, but broken people are overwhelmed with a sense of their own spiritual need.

Proud people are self-righteous. They have a critical, fault-finding spirit. They look at everyone else's faults with a microscope but their own with a telescope, and they look down on others. But broken people are compassionate. They can forgive much because they know how much they have been forgiven. They think the best of others, and they esteem all others better than themselves.

Proud people have an independent, self-sufficient spirit, but broken people have a dependent spirit and recognize their need for others.

Proud people have to prove that they're right, but broken people are willing to yield the right to be right…..do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?? LOL

Proud people claim rights and have a demanding spirit, but broken people yield their rights and have a meek spirit.

Proud people are self-protective of their time, their rights, and their reputation, but broken people are self-denying. Broken people put others first.

Proud people desire to be served, but broken people are motivated to serve others.

Proud people desire for self-advancement, but broken people desire to promote others. Broken people come alongside each other...they tie heart strings and point each other to Christ.

Proud people have a drive to be recognized, to be appreciated. Broken people have a sense of their own unworthiness. They're thrilled that God would use them at all in any ministry. They're eager for others to get the credit, and they rejoice when others are lifted up.

Proud people have a subconscious feeling, "This ministry is privileged to have me and my gifts." They think of what they can do for God, but broken people have that heart attitude that says, "I don't deserve to have any part in this ministry." They know that they have nothing to offer God except the life of Jesus flowing through their broken lives.

Proud people feel confident in how much they know, but broken people are humbled by how very much they have to learn. Broken people never stop seeking the truth and never stop desiring to learn and understand God’s Word

Proud people are self-conscious, but broken people are not concerned with self at all.

Proud people keep others at arm’s length, but broken people are willing to risk getting close to others and to take the risks of loving intimately.

Proud people are quick to blame others, but broken people accept personal responsibility and can see where they were wrong in the situation. Oh how we need this kind of thinking in our world...in our churches...in our homes.

Proud people are unapproachable, but broken people are ready and willing with their arms open wide.

Proud people are defensive when criticized, but broken people receive criticism with a humble, open spirit. Are you willing to listen when someone confronts you with a criticism?? Are you willing to hear them out and be willing to ask God to show where you need work rather than show them what's wrong with them??

Proud people are concerned with being respectable. They're concerned with what others think, and they're working to protect their own image and reputation. But broken people are concerned with being real. What they care about and what matters to them is not what others think but what God knows….come on somebody!!!!!!!!, and they're willing to die to their own reputation.

Proud people find it difficult to share their spiritual needs with others, but broken people are willing to be open and transparent with others as God directs.

Proud people, when they have sinned, want to be sure that no one finds out….King Saul. Their instinct is to cover up, but broken people, once they've been broken, they don't care who knows or who finds out...David. They are willing to be exposed because they have nothing to lose.

When confessing their sin, proud people tend to deal in generalities, but broken people are able to deal under the conviction of God's Spirit to acknowledge specifics. Are we specific about our sins?? Broken people are very aware and very sensitive to sin...

Proud people are concerned about the consequences of their sin, but broken people are grieved over the cause, the root of their sin. Proud people are remorseful over their sin, sorry that they got found out or caught. But broken people are truly, genuinely repentant over their sin, which is evidenced in the fact that they forsake that sin.

Proud people compare themselves with others and feel worthy of honor, but broken people compare themselves to the holiness of God and feel a desperate need for His mercy. When He is our standard, our perspectives change greatly.

Proud people are blind to their real heart condition, but broken people walk in the light. Proud people don't think they have anything to repent of, but broken people realize that they have need of a continual heart attitude of repentance.

Proud, unbroken people don't think they need revival, but they're sure that everyone else does. Whereas humble, broken people continually sense their need for a fresh encounter with God, for a fresh filling of His Holy Spirit.

Proud people have a hard time saying, "I was wrong. Will you please forgive me?" But broken people are quick to admit their failure and to seek forgiveness when necessary. When there's a misunderstanding or conflict in relationships, proud people wait for the other to come and ask forgiveness, but broken people take the initiative to be reconciled. They race to the cross. They see if they can get there first, no matter how wrong the other may have been. I’m gonna let that marinate for a second….because sometimes we think it is so hard...seeking out reconciliation and restoration in sticky situations where the lines are blurred...when satan has been working overtime and discombobulated doesn't even begin to describe the situation...maybe if the Lord renews our brokenness, it gets to be a little easier because all of a sudden it is not so much about the facts as it is being in right relationship with our Father...which means lives peaceably among men...which means in every situation as sinners living in our flesh, we could have done something different...a word, a look….did we seek God enough?? Did we give enough grace?? Broken people know they mess up and need that same grace we are called to give. I have had to do some serious soul searching in this area. Because of my own pridefulness, I have prayed for others to realize their sin and have waited for them to come to apologize or ask me for forgiveness...to give me grace. But as a broken person, I realized I had to change my thinking and my focus...I needed to be the grace giver...so over the last several weeks I have prayerful and painfully sent out several text messages and even develived a couple of dozen eggs to some of the folks that have left over the years...friends that I have desired reconciliation and peace with…. AND IT WAS GOOD and it was worth it and it helped me see that I have an opportunity to encourage yall to do the same types of things with some of the same folks or other people in your lives where relationships need to be restored, repaired, and renewed. Forgive me when and if I have been a hindrance on reconciliation with our past church members who were our friends….I had to do some serious soul searching…..facebook - get off or get over myself…..

Revival starts with us...it starts with our brokenness and it can only happen when we let the Lord work in our hearts...because satan is working against us, he wants to keep us at odds with our brothers and sisters in Christ...he wants us to remember and not just remember but dwell on and focus on the hurts….conversions you had in the past as well as conversations you heard about!!!....he wants us to be bitter and not better…..he doesn't want us to see our own sin in the situations...he wants us to be victims, and Friends, we can never be the victim if we are in Christ….and he wants me to be scared to tell you and encourage you to be the bigger person because of my own insecurities and fears….BUT GOD!!!!!! If I am truly being broken and spilled out then I want the same thing for y'all...I will tell y'all to do the hard things….to have hard conversations...to put yourself out there trusting the Lord to work as His sees fit...and He will get all the glory for the great things He has done...in our relationships, in our lives, but most importantly in our hearts...that is when we will have a personal revival….that is when true renewing can take place in our minds….that is when He will renew our zeal and our joy and our perspectives and our witness and relationships and our strength….in our humility, in our brokenness, is where we find Jesus.

Well that was a long list….but there was a common theme...there's a cycle in the ways of God that brokenness leads to genuine repentance.

Genuine repentance leads to forgiveness.

Forgiveness will produce in my life freedom from the guilt, freedom from the bondage of myself and my sin….

that freedom will produce a new capacity for love and worship and a capacity to love others, to love the unlovable, to love God, to worship God….the broken are blessed….in our brokenness is where we find true revival. And hasn’t that been our focus all year..for the Lord to renew us and revive us. Broken people don’t just survive, they thrive. That seems so contradictory… but remember, I’m talking about the Biblical brokenness not the worldly definition...God uses broken things and broken people to accomplish His will...It is in our brokenness that we bear fruit.

It’s when the little boy's five loaves were broken—
It's when Mary's alabaster box was broken that the fragrance was released and filled the whole house.
And as we've said, it's when Jesus' body was broken on Calvary that eternal life was released for the salvation of the world.

Then the fruit of brokenness is to be seen in revival. That for which we have longed and prayed is really nothing more than the release of God's Spirit through broken lives.

So what is God saying to you?? Has God’s Spirit been tugging at your heart? Is there a step of brokenness He is leading you to take?....read papers….I want us to spend some time seeking the Lord...listening and singing if you feel led….but really just getting real and right before the Lord…..

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